I painted this picture a few weeks ago..
While I was painting it I imagined someone happily dancing and twirling through a water puddle..
Now as I look at it.. it's actually a great summery of my life.
Someone testing the waters... trying not to fall into the deep end.
It's me.. trying to balance.
trying to find a direction without sinking.
I am resilient.. I will not sink..
but it will take some paddling.. lots and lots of paddling to get where i need to be.
Eventually.. as I realize that this change that this I am going through is a good thing...
I will find myself floating again.
but it's not gonna be easy..
first I need to patch up the holes in my heart.
I'm gonna spend lots of extra time out here on the sun porch.
I am not going to reflect on what is missing from my life..
but on all that I have.
My family who loves me.
I'm gonna hang on to every soft spoken word from my husband.
I'm going to trust his promises and follow my own.
I'm going to smile when I hear my girls giggle.
I'm gonna wish my friends well..
I'm gonna hold on to my doggies
and decide if it's worth moving forward or taking a step back.
Regardless of where this new road takes me..
I'm gonna swim
and with this family by my side..
I'm gonna get the medal.